“We should feel sorrow, but not sink under its oppression.”
– Confucius
Living vicariously rather than facing reality.
It’s no secret that art can imitate life. Perhaps this is why we often find books, TV shows, and movies so relatable.
When searching for a good show to watch or book to read, we sometimes find ourselves searching for characters with whom we identify, watching how they go through experiences similar to our own.
Most people have not been taught to name and understand their mental health experiences. Worse, many have been shamed for struggling with depression and other forms of mental health issues.
“A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.”
— Rose
Rose, from the movie Titanic, thought, “It was the ship of dreams to everyone else. As for me, it was a slave ship, taking me back to America in chains. Outwardly, I was everything a well-brought-up girl should be. Inside, I was screaming.”
Many times, it can appear on the outside that everything is wonderful. You have the great home, the gorgeous spouse, the right job, and, yet, you might be like Rose screaming inside.
Depression knows no boundaries.
The feelings of being stuck, hopeless, or helpless are not just for the poor and disenfranchised.
Feeling like you don’t recognize yourself, you’ve lost your motivation, your passion, or your sense of self is scary. Or maybe you have never had those things in your life because you woke up one day and realized that five years have gone by and you have not reached one of your goals – that is just as daunting.
It can happen to anyone.
Depression is indiscriminate; it does not differentiate between those who have fame, status, wealth, or class. It is pervasive, and it hits anyone at any time.
Secrets don’t ease the pain.
We often feel like we must keep our depression secret because we fear that we will be judged or criticized for not being grateful for the life we do have.
But, those secrets inside of us – whether it is current depression, past trauma, or future worries – can become toxic to our soul.
We must not let that stay hidden within us; we must seek help.
Living a life chosen by others brings heartache.
“I saw my whole life as if I’d already lived it. An endless parade of parties and cotillions, yachts, and polo matches. Always the same narrow people, the same mindless chatter. I felt like I was standing at a great precipice with no one to pull me back.” — Rose
Rose felt pressure from her family, friends, and her social status to marry someone she did not even love.
Sometimes, we all feel that pressure to live a life that is not of our own choosing.
It is like we are on autopilot seeing our life pass us by, and we have no control over what happens; we feel powerless.
We become so depressed that it is hard to even go on anymore. Each day is a chore, each encounter with another person is work, and we just want to hide.
Does anyone hear you?
Rose said, “I feel like I’m standing in the middle of a crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs, and no one even looks up.”
Who is paying attention?
Who notices that you are in this despair?
I hear and am willing to listen.
I can assure you that I will notice, and I will pay attention.
My approach is to help you unburden yourself and become more of who you authentically want to be.
It is not enough to pass through life and wish you felt better, hoping that someday things will change.
Clinical depression lingers; it does not typically go away on its own. If it does, it takes a long time for that to happen.
I pursued this field because I understand depression. It runs in my family. I have struggled with it off and on throughout my life. But, thankfully, I can say that through the help of a therapist, and some great support systems, I have been able to come out the other side.
And through my studies, I have found very effective ways to help you move out of your depression.
Let’s work together to find your authentic self.
No more secrets, no more internal agony, and no more depression. Together, we can work to help you find the life you want, not the one chosen by others.
If you would like to have a free 15-minute consult to discuss your situation, please call me at (562) 213-5318.